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17 March 2016

Memory Lane - remembering BLU

Better Loosen Up died yesterday. He was 30 years old. We knew him as BLU. He'd been one of "my boys" at Living Legends since around 2006. I was very fond of him. I didn't photograph him racing, save for my very first trip to the Cox Plate in 1992 when I was a complete novice. There might be a frame or 2 if him but I'm sure they won't do him any justice. Justly I photographed him at the farm and during his public appearances. He was a lovely gentle soul and I feel very sad. 

I realise that I must start updating my Blog on a far more regular basis and not only do it when a special horse dies. 

Memory recollections are a strange thing though. Take today for instance. I'm sitting in my car before I head inside Moorabbin Hospital for a routine appointment with my nice physic who treats the stupid swelling I get as a result of losing lymph glands in Sept 2014 when I was diagnosed with a pretty nasty cancer. Driving here triggers all sorts of unpleasant memories and I don't like it, although I like the nurse tremendously. He's ace. But for an at times anxiety riddled girl like me, who stops still in fear of something nasty returning, the trips in here aren't much fun. Little triggers such as a wave of nausea when I pass the service station I threw up at, a wry smile passing the fish and chips shop where one day I managed a couple of potato cakes when I was hardly eating and rapidly losing weight, and unable to face much food, but I was so hungry that it felt so good. 

I brace myself everyone I walk through the doors of the hospital. Because it's horrible, and I walk quickly through the entrance with my head down, not looking at anything until I get upstairs and key go of the breath I've been holding. 

Just as I do when I receive the first question on everyone's lips every time they see me:  "how's your health?  Are you all clear?" It seems like bad luck to be cocky, so I just say "right now they say I look great".